Child of God, are you growing weary?
Are Spiritual attacks growing in frequency and intensity like never before?
Personally, I am weary. I feel the pressure of the enemy against me more than ever.
The worse the earth does wax, the closer to the end, the tougher the journey, right?
Putting my own flesh to death in order to live and walk by the Spirit completely is very agonizing. Stepping out of years of Lukewarmness and choosing to take Jesus’ hand means surrendering everything. Giving God 100% and not 25%. This past year I finally got it. My life isn’t for me. This thing is not about me. I was created by the Lord and for Him. Everyone has a unique purpose in life given by God, and I am not ugly because my midsection is not flat. I finally accept myself for who I have become… For the things I didn’t finish. For failures. For my struggles with Bipolar disorder and Bulimia. I finally accept the truth that we all function at different levels with our mental illnesses and whatever else we are battling.
I am so relieved to say that by the end of my twenties (I turn 30 in May) I’ve finally stopped trying to be the person I planned to be, and have offered myself to God completely. May He refine me, mold me, sculpt me, and let me work for Him. I have become ready to be the person God has called me to be. The woman I was designed to be. His personal creation.
And it’s okay now.
*Image via Google, lyrics by Matt Maher (Everything and Nothing) added